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Dark humour

For open minds. Dark jokes that make you laugh and think.

What's the worst thing about being a vampire?

— Having bad blood with everyone.

Dark humour

What is ghosts' favorite food?

— Spaghetti with body.

Dark humour

What's a ghost's favorite food?

— Spaghetti with body.

Dark humour

What do you call a cemetery full of computer programmers?

— Silicon Valley.

Dark humour

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on black humor.

— The librarian says, "We don't laugh at those things here." The man replies, "Don't worry, I don't either."

Dark humour

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor tells him: "Bad news: you have six months to live." The man: "Can't you give me more time?" The doctor: "Well, twelve months if you eat healthy." The man: "What's the difference?"

— "None, you're still going to die, just healthier."

Dark humour

What does one skeleton say to another?

— Without you I'm nothing!

Dark humour

What's the ultimate characteristic of a vampire?

— Having bad blood with everyone.

Dark humour

A man enters a library and asks for a book on black humor.

— The librarian tells him: "We don't laugh at those things here." The man responds: "Don't worry, neither do I."

Dark humour

A lawyer and a politician fall into the water. Who do you save first?

— No one, that way the world is a better place.

Dark humour

What is green and if you fall on it, it kills you?

— A pool table on the 15th floor.

Dark humour
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